champagne tastes on a beer budget

This is one of those great dishes for when you don't feel like cooking. It comes together in under ten minutes, is cheap, and very healthy.

It helps if you have some pesto on hand (see previous pesto recipe). I try to keep some in the freezer for just such an occasion. The title IS the recipe: cook a box of penne. Add a bag of frozen peas just at the end, about thirty seconds before you drain the pasta. Mix it all together with the pesto. Voila.

Cost: a box of penne (retail, not bulk) is about $1.29. A bag of frozen peas will run around $1. The pesto I usually make in batches in the summer, when basil is plentiful; the cost of a homemade batch is around $1, including the pine nuts and parmesan. The cost of store-bought is usually around $4.99. Best case scenario, a little over $3 for this, and it will feed 3-4 adults as a main dish.

For ice cream, milk, desserts, etc.

3/4 cup water
1 1/2 cups sugar
3/4 cup cocoa
1/2 tablespoon vanilla
pinch of salt
1 tablespoon light Karo syrup

Heat the water and sugar to a boil, whisk in the rest and continue whisking until the solids are dissolved. Continue cooking until reduced. Cool slightly and serve. The rest keeps for a long time in a jar in your refrigerator.

Cost: all these ingredients are pantry staples, so a batch will run MAYBE 50 cents, if you use the good cocoa. Considering a bottle of Hershey's syrup is running about $5 these days, and is full of crap, and this takes about three minutes to whip up, you can now have good homemade chocolate syrup all the time.

For years I kept a box of Bisquick handy. Then one day I realized I was out of Bisquick and made pancakes from scratch. They taste completely different. The homemade ones are lighter, fluffier, and don't have that chemical aftertaste that Bisquick does. Besides, you have to add milk and eggs to Bisquick anyway, right? Making them from scratch takes maybe 45 seconds longer than making them from a mix.

1 1/4 cups White Lily flour (use the regular kind if you must)
1 teaspoon baking powder
2 tablespoons sugar
1 cup milk
1 egg
1 tablespoon vegetable oil

Combine the dry ingredients, then the wet, then add the two together and mix.

The secret to a good pancake is a really, really hot skillet or griddle. Heat it for several minutes, then put the butter on it at the very last second before adding the batter. Don't flip the pancake until you see bubbles formed all through the dough—that means you've got a good crust on the other side.

Serve with jam or real maple syrup. YUM.

(Not to be confused with biscuits—biscuits are biscuits, but rolls are yeast bread. Don't use the White Lily flour for yeast bread, use the regular all-purpose stuff for these rolls.) This is not the most accurate recipe, as my mother never measures anything. That's the beauty of cooking a lot—eventually you make one thing so many times that you know the proportions by sight, and you can leave the measuring cups in the drawer. This sounds like a lot of effort for rolls, since the dough rises three times, but you can start this in the morning and just periodically poke at it throughout the day. It makes A LOT of rolls. Don't even think about substituting rolls from the supermarket.

all-purpose or bread flour, probably 7-8 cups
1 tablespoon salt
2-3 tablespoons sugar (or half a handful)
2-3 tablespoons yeast (or half a handful)

Sift these together. To this add COOLED mixture of milk, water and one stick of butter that has been simmered and then cooled—too hot and you will kill the yeast and curdle the eggs which you will be putting in the next step. The mix needs to be lukewarm to the touch. Equal amounts of water and milk,  probably about 2-3 cups of each.
 
Mix the liquids and the flour mixture well, add 3-4 eggs. Continue mixing the dough and adding flour until you have the consistency of bread dough. Knead for several minutes on a well-floured surface. You cannot knead yeast dough too much. Beat out any aggression you have with the dough.

Place in a large bowl that will allow the dough to double, and coat the entire ball of dough with cooking oil. Let the dough rise, knead it, and place it back in the bowl to rise 3 times.After the third time, knead the dough in flour on your counter, have some melted butter ready and pinch off enough dough for a roll, work it in your hand , dip it in the butter, fold it over , dip it in the butter and place in a greased pan to rise. Let all the rolls rise, place in a pre-heated oven at about 400 degrees for about 10-15 minutes until golden brown. The amount of time will depend on how quickly your oven cooks. 
 
You can use this same recipe for cinnamon rolls, with a few modifications. Use four eggs, slightly more milk and slightly less water for a richer dough. Divide the dough into 3 pieces, roll out each third until an even 1/4-1/3 inch thick. Spread honey all over the dough to within about 1/2 inch of the edge, and sprinkle with a mixture of sugar and cinammon—2 parts sugar and 1 part cinnamon. You can use raisins or nuts if you like. Roll this up and let dough rest for about 8-10 minutes, cut into about 1-1/2 inch slices. Place in a greased pan, leaving enough room between each roll for it to rise, and bake at about 375-400 degrees until golden brown. Let the rolls cool slightly and ice with a mixture of confectioner's suger and either cream or half-and-half.

Mmmm...peanut butter.

1 cup shortening (like Crisco)
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup sugar
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 cup peanut butter
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 eggs
3 cups flour

Cream the shortening and sugars. Add eggs and peanut butter, beat until smooth. Add the rest, mix well, and drop by spoonfuls onto greased cookie sheets. Press down with a fork. Bake at 350 until brown. (Maybe 7 to 10 minutes? Start checking them after that.)

I had a small head of broccoli that needed to be used up, but I was tired of my usual broccoli preparations. So I made a broccoli and feta sauce (which, handily, also used some of the feta cheese that needed to be used up).

1 lb broccoli, or thereabouts
olive oil
1/2 onion or two shallots, chopped
2-3 cloves garlic, minced
1/2 cup chopped parsley
juice of one lemon
1/2 cup feta cheese
1/4 cup water

Lightly steam or boil the broccoli just for a minute. The broccoli stalks can be used too—if the broccoli is small and young, just throw them in whole. If it's one of those big tough heads of broccoli, peel the central stalk before adding it. (The stalk has just as much flavor as the heads, and since you'll be pureeing this later on, you don't need to worry about the aesthetic value of the stalk.) You want the broccoli to still be a little crisp and bright green. Meanwhile saute the shallots and garlic in the olive oil. Add the broccoli and saute for a few minutes, until the onion is soft. Add the parsley and cook until wilted. Add the lemon juice and cook for another minute or two.

Dump into a food processor along with 1/4 cup of feta and 1/4 cup of water. (But really, more cheese won't hurt anything.) Puree until smooth and serve over pasta, with a little olive oil and more feta on top. I used papardelle, but any kind will do.

Cost: depending on the cost of broccoli in your area, anywhere from $1.50 to $2.50 for a head. We'll say $2, plus another $2 for the feta (less, if you buy it in bulk), 50 cents for the lemon, 50 cents for everything else. I used two packages of papardelle from Trader Joe's at $2 each. That's $4 for the pasta and another $5 for the sauce, but I could have used a cheaper pasta (spaghetti, penne) and I did buy the feta in bulk. Anywhere from $6 to $9 for the entire dish, making four adult servings at $1.50 to $2.25 per serving.

This recipe comes from my old roomie Shelby!

2 acorn squash, pricked and microwaved 8-10 minutes until soft and scoopable
1 tablespoon butter
1 chopped onion
Thyme
1 can chicken broth (or about two cups)
½ cup cream

Scoop out squash. Cook onion in butter 3-5 minutes. Add rest, plus squash, and 2 cups water. Cook 10-12 minutes. Puree, return to pan. Add cream, season, serve.

I make this with whatever leftover cheese I have—I've used all sorts of different leftover bits of stinky cheese, gorgonzola, mozzarella, parmesan, gruyere, fontina, asiago, goat, etc., etc. You can combine them all, or if you have kids, you can use plain old cheddar. If you have some soft cheese rinds, like the kind that come on brie (or stinky cheese), you can add those to the sauce as well. They'll melt down and add some more cheese flavor.

You can also use different shapes of pasta, not just macaroni—cavatelli, shells, whatever.

1 lb. pasta, cooked until al dente
6 tablespoons butter
6 tablespoons flour
2 cups milk
1 teaspoon salt
pinch of pepper and nutmeg
1/2 cup heavy cream
1 1/2 to 2 cups cheese, any kind, grated or cut into small pieces
1 thawed box of frozen spinach, with the extra water squeezed out; or a couple of bunches of fresh spinach; or really any kind of greenery (kale, chard, broccoli rabe, etc.)

Preheat oven to 400. Melt the butter in a saucepan, add the flour, and mix well. Add the milk and the seasonings and whisk constantly until the mixture thickens and boils (a few minutes). Allow to boil very briefly. Add the cheese and cream and stir until the cheese is melted. Add the cheese mixture to the cooked pasta and the spinach and mix well. Pour into a large casserole dish. Top with grated parmesan or bread crumbs. Bake 35-40 minutes uncovered. Serve drizzled with truffle oil.

After I started making fresh salsa, I couldn't go back to canned. It tastes like chemicals to me. (Which it is.) Granted, sometimes it's hard to have fresh ingredients on hand every time I want salsa. I have fallback recipes—bean dip, spinach and artichoke dip—for those times. But if you have the ingredients, the taste is incomparable. And it only takes a couple of minutes to whip up.

The base ingredients are chopped onion (red or regular, as you prefer), chopped and seeded jalapeno, cilantro, and lime juice—all fresh, of course. To this base, you can add chopped tomatoes, mango or peach, for tomato, mango or peach salsa. Of course, you can extrapolate further. I've made pineapple, canteloupe and cucumber salsa as well, although with lighter ingredients like canteloupe or cucumber you may want to substitute mint for the cilantro.

The best, and easiest, biscuits ever.

2 cups White Lily self-rising flour, 2 cups heavy cream.

Yep, that's it. The secret is the White Lily self-rising flour—you will NOT get the same results with any other brand of self-rising flour. White Lily is made from soft winter wheat, giving it a different gluten structure than other sorts of flour. It's not great for yeast breads, but for biscuits, cakes, pancakes, etc., Southern cooks have prized it for years. The downside is that it's difficult to find outside the South—so if you can find it, grab two or three bags and make some biscuits.

Mix the above two ingredients until just blended, being careful not to overwork the dough. Cut into rounds and bake 10-12 minutes at 425. That's it. It takes less time than opening and cooking a can of pre-made biscuits, and these taste so, so much better.